You’ve come to us, on this, the day of Don’s daughter’s wedding. You honor the “family” by being here. The don does not take that lightly. We appreciate you coming to pay tribute. As such we would like to show you some appreciation. We have recently “acquired” some information from our man on the inside. You think you know what knuckles you want? Forgedaboutit! The godfather knuckle weight makes all those other knuckles look like plain goons. Ain’t nothing better to catch a dame’s eye than the godfather knuckle.
We got a man on the inside, a real quality individual this one. He tells us these impressive pieces are made out of stainless steel. That is some strong material, right there. Ain’t nobody got the ice to spend on some cheap piece. My dear sweet momma used to say “never reinforce failure, never marry a losing hand”. She was a smart woman my momma, made a mean cannoli and an even meaner ravioli. She knew quality when she saw it. I wouldn’t give her anything less than the best. I make sure she carries one of these quality pieces in her purse, better safe than sorry. We know you can count on these belt buckles/ paperweights. Stainless steel is nothing to bat an eye at, no doubt it will stand up to anything you can throw at it.
The don is a busy man so let’s move on. The godfather knuckle handle is wrapped in leather. As far as I understand leather comes from cows, and I ain’t talking about that broad on 47th who won’t let us smoke on her porch. The leather provides a comfortable grip, as well as making it look all nice and pretty on your belt buckle.
This “family” is one that loves options. The boss is a man who likes to know he has a choice in the matter. And the Godfather knuckles provides several different options. Taking the dame out somewhere fancy? Get the black one. Ain’t nothing compliment a pin stripe suite like the black one. Or, if you wanna make sure those goons up on Yancy Street understand who’s in charge, go with the gold. Got this cousin of mine, big guy, great enforcer. He swears by the gold. Says there ain’t no better option for making sure everyone knows who the muscle is. The last option is the Dons personal favorite. The Silver. This is one classy piece. Perfect for the classy situation, like your nieces birthday or the day of your daughter’s wedding. No matter what color you go with, you can be positive you look like a real made man!
Now the Don himself wants me to make something crystal clear. DON’T BE A GOON!! Ain’t nobody needs to get pinched by a copper for carrying one of these beauts. Don’t get yourself in a situation where some gum shoe is gonna make a stool pigeon out of you! We don’t need you in the big house. You’re good people, but don’t think you won’t get fitted for a pair of your very own cement shoes. Make sure these belt buckles are legal to carry before you get one. Don’t get yourself in trouble. Cause we all know what happens to the guy who becomes more trouble than he is worth. Just ask Pauly.
The Boss’s patience grows thin. This conversation has come to an end. Go out, and get yourself one of these. Then let us know which one you prefer. Getoutahere ya numb skull!